Dear Mr and Mrs Tax Payer
Dear Mr and Mrs tax payer, we, the executives of AIG wish to thank you for your kind donation to help us fulfill our greedy intentions. We know that you work hard and long for your money and we have been so grateful that we loved our $400,000 dollar vacation retreat paid for by you. Each and everyone of you should be happy to know that we enjoyed ourselves very much on your dime. While you were hard at work at your job and worrying about paying the bills, we were relaxing by the pool, eating extremely well, oh!, and the massages helped to relieve the tensions. The group of us had been sick worrying that we would not be able to afford this extravagant vacation/retreat this year but ... you all came through for us in perfect timing. There just wasn't anyway possible that we could have enjoyed ourselves without each and every one of your generous donation. Sitting around our table eating fine food and drinking we gave a toast to all of you, and a laughing great time too, with hopes that each of you can now work that second or third job into your seventies and beyond. It is also with great hope that any of you working out there who may get fired from your job that you, like Mr. Sullivan, gets a multi-million dollar severance package to award you for a poor job done.
Thank you once again one and all. Oh, and don't forget to buy more insurance from us as we still have our huge mortgages and more vacations to take. You can be proud of the fact that you helped us have such a wonderful time with your tax dollars. Don't worry about our retirement as we have put away millions to make sure we will be perfectly comfortable.
(This is just another reason as to why I, Wooleybugger, do not trust people wearing suits, who have short hair and are clean shaven in the executive big company world. These people are playing with our lives and lively hoods and screwing us everyday and yet they still get away with it. Don't you think that we all now own a piece of AIG and as such owners collectively should be able to seize these executives property? These people are nothing more than thieves and shysters who should be made to pay back, out of their own pockets to us, all of the retreat monies plus penalties. We should be able to take them each to court and fine them all 5 million dollars each for mis-appropriation of funds. I just bet they are all laughing so hard at us that their stomachs hurt).